.

Dad... I miss you!!

I miss you dad.

On the 25th of June, 2011 I wrote:

"Something bad is coming our way.

I can feel it.

It's in the air, it's everywhere.

I'm not a pessimist.

I'm just trying to be honest.

I can smell death."

And death it was.

He left us on the 27th of June.

`Yes he is gone` what I always try to tell myself.

Up until now I can't believe that.

I do miss him, like I never missed anyone before.

I do miss you Dad, I do truly miss you.

8 months, just like yesterday.

The day you left us is still engraved in my memory, I didn't say goodbye to you.

I was busy doing something else when you asked about me, I swear I wanted to come to you after I finish but then you slept and I thought I will see you when you wake up, but you didn't. Please forgive me. Please forgive me.

If I only knew you will leave us, if I only knew.

I know you are in a better place now, you never liked it here.

May your soul rest in peace.

I miss you dad.

Still here...

I'm here and there but I'm still here

Weak but strong

Sad and happy

I'm still the same

Not really the same

Quit the same

A change here and there

Still waiting for the big change

Cause I'm still here

5 years of blogging...

I really didn't want to post anything, everything looks so dull around me

didn't want to darken my blog world too, but because it is my Blogoversery I had to squeeze some words. I felt that it is like a duty to me, oh well Happy Blogoversery anyway! :/

More stuff...

So I bought few more things

-Distress Ink in Black Soot

-2 punches

-Tim Holtz mini compass mask: This thing is great

-Music sheet clear stamp from KaiserCraft : a bit long for my acrylic block but still I can use it

-Ranger mini Glossy accent, and when they say mini it is REALLY ABSOLUTELY mini, I guess I bought the sample not for resale one :s

-Ranger Perfect Pearls in red

-Ranger Embossing pen in white and black: I so love them

-Paper Embossing tool in a heart shape

-Encore Ultimate metallic ink in purple

and more and more patterned paper, can't say no to them

I made this small notebook with a tag as a cover page, I am happy with it, it looks much better than in pictures. Used the embossing pen to make the dots since I don't have polka dot stamp.

And tried the compass mask, loved it!! and again it looks better than in pictures.

I guess I will be buying more masks, they are fun to use!

The God of Small Things...

I have just finished reading The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. It has been long since I last read something. I can say that I had difficulties with this novel. I was lost most of the times, I had to refocus again and again until I get the idea of what is happening. Too many words I didn't understand and had to refer to some notes on the net so I can get along with the plot

. First, the characters were a bit confusing, their names and the too much details of everything. Well, it is all about the small things, small details but still I was lost. There were times when I really wanted to stop and just change the novel but I forced myself to continue and lucky I did. All in all, I loved it, loved the twins even more, how can someone stop talking all of a sudden?!

I loved this passage from chapter 12:

"The secret of the Great Stories is that they have no secrets. The Great Stories are the ones you have heard and want to hear again. The ones you can enter anywhere and inhabit comfortably. They don’t deceive you with thrills and trick endings. They don’t surprise you with the unforeseen. They are as familiar as the house you live in. Or the smell of your lover’s skin. You know how they end, yet you listen as though you don’t. In the way that although you know that one day you will die, you live as though you won’t. In the Great Stories you know who lives, who dies, who finds love, who doesn’t. And yet you want to know again. That is their mystery and magic."

My next novel would be The Immigrant by Manju Kapur

Mustered curry ginger egg sandwich

I love mustard, curry and ginger.

Combine them in to your egg sandwich and you will get a masterpiece

Add scallion, tomato, lettuce, lemon, pepper, and a bit of mayonnaise

Spread the ingredients on you whole wheat bread toast or any of your favorite

And viola!!

There you have it, just like in the picture or something similar!

P.S. I was in a hungry mood, don't mind the ta5bees.

Just let me be..

You will not hear me complain

My feelings and interests will be invisible to you

I promise you

I will smile like nothing is happening

On many conditions

Leave me alone

Don't pity me, I don't need your sympathy

Let me grieve in silence

Don't ask me to give more than I can

Don't ask me to do anything against my will

I have tried my best to fulfill your wishes but in vain

I gave up

Just let me be

Please

A new year, a new attitude...

A new year with a new attitude.

Some people will not like that, some will.

I don't know,I don't care.

Seriously, I don't care!

Take me as what I am today..

or just turn around and leave...

Who cares?

I DON'T

An end or a beginning ..?

I really don't know whether me being sick on the 30th of last year was the end of a bad year or a beginning of a new one, let's hope for the first.

Happy New year ♥